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+Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister
+on the bank, and of having nothing to do:  once or twice she had
+peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no
+pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,'
+thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?'
+So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could,
+for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether
+the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble
+of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White
+Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
+There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice
+think it so VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to
+itself, `Oh dear!  Oh dear!  I shall be late!'  (when she thought
+it over afterwards, it occurred to her that she ought to have
+wondered at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural);
+but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-
+POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, Alice started to
+her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had never
+before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
+take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the
+field after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop
+down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge.
+In another moment down went Alice after it, never once
+considering how in the world she was to get out again.
+The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way,
+and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a
+moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself
+falling down a very deep well.
+Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she
+had plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to
+wonder what was going to happen next.  First, she tried to look
+down and make out what she was coming to, but it was too dark to
+see anything; then she looked at the sides of the well, and
+noticed that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves;
+here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs.  She
+took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was
+labelled `ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great disappointment it
+was empty:  she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing
+somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she
+fell past it.
+`Well!' thought Alice to herself, `after such a fall as this, I
+shall think nothing of tumbling down stairs!  How brave they'll
+all think me at home!  Why, I wouldn't say anything about it,
+even if I fell off the top of the house!' (Which was very likely
+true.)
+Down, down, down.  Would the fall NEVER come to an end!  `I
+wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud.
+`I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth.  Let
+me see:  that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for,
+you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her
+lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a VERY good
+opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to
+listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes,
+that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude
+or Longitude I've got to?'  (Alice had no idea what Latitude was,
+or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to
+say.)
+Presently she began again.  `I wonder if I shall fall right
+THROUGH the earth!  How funny it'll seem to come out among the
+people that walk with their heads downward!  The Antipathies, I
+think--' (she was rather glad there WAS no one listening, this
+time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) `--but I shall
+have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know.
+Please, Ma'am, is this New Zealand or Australia?' (and she tried
+to curtsey as she spoke--fancy CURTSEYING as you're falling
+through the air!  Do you think you could manage it?)  `And what
+an ignorant little girl she'll think me for asking!  No, it'll
+never do to ask:  perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.'
+Down, down, down.  There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon
+began talking again.  `Dinah'll miss me very much to-night, I
+should think!'  (Dinah was the cat.)  `I hope they'll remember
+her saucer of milk at tea-time.  Dinah my dear!  I wish you were
+down here with me!  There are no mice in the air, I'm afraid, but
+you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know.
+But do cats eat bats, I wonder?'  And here Alice began to get
+rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy sort of
+way, `Do cats eat bats?  Do cats eat bats?' and sometimes, `Do
+bats eat cats?' for, you see, as she couldn't answer either
+question, it didn't much matter which way she put it.  She felt
+that she was dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she
+was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and saying to her very
+earnestly, `Now, Dinah, tell me the truth:  did you ever eat a
+bat?' when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of
+sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
+Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a
+moment:  she looked up, but it was all dark overhead; before her
+was another long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in
+sight, hurrying down it.  There was not a moment to be lost:
+away went Alice like the wind, and was just in time to hear it
+say, as it turned a corner, `Oh my ears and whiskers, how late
+it's getting!'  She was close behind it when she turned the
+corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen:  she found
+herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps
+hanging from the roof.
+There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked;
+and when Alice had been all the way down one side and up the
+other, trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle,
+wondering how she was ever to get out again.
+Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table, all made of
+solid glass; there was nothing on it except a tiny golden key,
+and Alice's first thought was that it might belong to one of the
+doors of the hall; but, alas! either the locks were too large, or
+the key was too small, but at any rate it would not open any of
+them.  However, on the second time round, she came upon a low
+curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it was a little
+door about fifteen inches high:  she tried the little golden key
+in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted!
+Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small
+passage, not much larger than a rat-hole:  she knelt down and
+looked along the passage into the loveliest garden you ever saw.
+How she longed to get out of that dark hall, and wander about
+among those beds of bright flowers and those cool fountains, but
+she could not even get her head though the doorway; `and even if
+my head would go through,' thought poor Alice, `it would be of
+very little use without my shoulders.  Oh, how I wish
+I could shut up like a telescope!  I think I could, if I only
+know how to begin.'  For, you see, so many out-of-the-way things
+had happened lately, that Alice had begun to think that very few
+things indeed were really impossible.
+There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she
+went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on
+it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like
+telescopes:  this time she found a little bottle on it, (`which
+certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck
+of the bottle was a paper label, with the words `DRINK ME'
+beautifully printed on it in large letters.
+It was all very well to say `Drink me,' but the wise little
+Alice was not going to do THAT in a hurry.  `No, I'll look
+first,' she said, `and see whether it's marked "poison" or not';
+for she had read several nice little histories about children who
+had got burnt, and eaten up by wild beasts and other unpleasant
+things, all because they WOULD not remember the simple rules
+their friends had taught them:  such as, that a red-hot poker
+will burn you if you hold it too long; and that if you cut your
+finger VERY deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she had
+never forgotten that, if you drink much from a bottle marked
+`poison,' it is almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or
+later.
+However, this bottle was NOT marked `poison,' so Alice ventured
+to taste it, and finding it very nice, (it had, in fact, a sort
+of mixed flavour of cherry-tart, custard, pine-apple, roast
+turkey, toffee, and hot buttered toast,) she very soon finished
+it off.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+`What a curious feeling!' said Alice; `I must be shutting up
+like a telescope.'
+And so it was indeed:  she was now only ten inches high, and
+her face brightened up at the thought that she was now the right
+size for going through the little door into that lovely garden.
+First, however, she waited for a few minutes to see if she was
+going to shrink any further:  she felt a little nervous about
+this; `for it might end, you know,' said Alice to herself, `in my
+going out altogether, like a candle.  I wonder what I should be
+like then?'  And she tried to fancy what the flame of a candle is
+like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember
+ever having seen such a thing.
+After a while, finding that nothing more happened, she decided
+on going into the garden at once; but, alas for poor Alice!
+when she got to the door, she found she had forgotten the
+little golden key, and when she went back to the table for it,
+she found she could not possibly reach it:  she could see it
+quite plainly through the glass, and she tried her best to climb
+up one of the legs of the table, but it was too slippery;
+and when she had tired herself out with trying,
+the poor little thing sat down and cried.
+`Come, there's no use in crying like that!' said Alice to
+herself, rather sharply; `I advise you to leave off this minute!'
+She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very
+seldom followed it), and sometimes she scolded herself so
+severely as to bring tears into her eyes; and once she remembered
+trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game
+of croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious
+child was very fond of pretending to be two people.  `But it's no
+use now,' thought poor Alice, `to pretend to be two people!  Why,
+there's hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable
+person!'
+Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under
+the table:  she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on
+which the words `EAT ME' were beautifully marked in currants.
+`Well, I'll eat it,' said Alice, `and if it makes me grow larger,
+I can reach the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can creep
+under the door; so either way I'll get into the garden, and I
+don't care which happens!'
+She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself, `Which
+way?  Which way?', holding her hand on the top of her head to
+feel which way it was growing, and she was quite surprised to
+find that she remained the same size:  to be sure, this generally
+happens when one eats cake, but Alice had got so much into the
+way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen,
+that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the
+common way.
+So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+CHAPTER II
+The Pool of Tears
+`Curiouser and curiouser!' cried Alice (she was so much
+surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good
+English); `now I'm opening out like the largest telescope that
+ever was!  Good-bye, feet!' (for when she looked down at her
+feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so
+far off).  `Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on
+your shoes and stockings for you now, dears?  I'm sure _I_ shan't
+be able!  I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself
+about you:  you must manage the best way you can; --but I must be
+kind to them,' thought Alice, `or perhaps they won't walk the
+way I want to go!  Let me see:  I'll give them a new pair of
+boots every Christmas.'
+And she went on planning to herself how she would manage it.
+`They must go by the carrier,' she thought; `and how funny it'll
+seem, sending presents to one's own feet!  And how odd the
+directions will look!
+ALICE'S RIGHT FOOT, ESQ.
+HEARTHRUG,
+NEAR THE FENDER,
+(WITH ALICE'S LOVE).
+Oh dear, what nonsense I'm talking!'
+Just then her head struck against the roof of the hall:  in
+fact she was now more than nine feet high, and she at once took
+up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door.
+Poor Alice!  It was as much as she could do, lying down on one
+side, to look through into the garden with one eye; but to get
+through was more hopeless than ever:  she sat down and began to
+cry again.
+`You ought to be ashamed of yourself,' said Alice, `a great
+girl like you,' (she might well say this), `to go on crying in
+this way!  Stop this moment, I tell you!'  But she went on all
+the same, shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool
+all round her, about four inches deep and reaching half down the
+hall.
+After a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the
+distance, and she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming.
+It was the White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a
+pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the
+other:  he came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to
+himself as he came, `Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! Oh! won't she
+be savage if I've kept her waiting!'  Alice felt so desperate
+that she was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit
+came near her, she began, in a low, timid voice, `If you please,
+sir--'  The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid
+gloves and the fan, and skurried away into the darkness as hard
+as he could go.
+Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very
+hot, she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking:
+`Dear, dear!  How queer everything is to-day!  And yesterday
+things went on just as usual.  I wonder if I've been changed in
+the night?  Let me think:  was I the same when I got up this
+morning?  I almost think I can remember feeling a little
+different.  But if I'm not the same, the next question is, Who in
+the world am I?  Ah, THAT'S the great puzzle!'  And she began
+thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age
+as herself, to see if she could have been changed for any of
+them.
+`I'm sure I'm not Ada,' she said, `for her hair goes in such
+long ringlets, and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all; and I'm
+sure I can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she,
+oh! she knows such a very little!  Besides, SHE'S she, and I'm I,
+and--oh dear, how puzzling it all is!  I'll try if I know all the
+things I used to know.  Let me see:  four times five is twelve,
+and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is--oh dear!
+I shall never get to twenty at that rate!  However, the
+Multiplication Table doesn't signify:  let's try Geography.
+London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome,
+and Rome--no, THAT'S all wrong, I'm certain!  I must have been
+changed for Mabel!  I'll try and say "How doth the little--"'
+and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons,
+and began to repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and
+strange, and the words did not come the same as they used to do:--
+`How doth the little crocodile
+Improve his shining tail,
+And pour the waters of the Nile
+On every golden scale!
+`How cheerfully he seems to grin,
+How neatly spread his claws,
+And welcome little fishes in
+With gently smiling jaws!'
+`I'm sure those are not the right words,' said poor Alice, and
+her eyes filled with tears again as she went on, `I must be Mabel
+after all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky little
+house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so
+many lessons to learn!  No, I've made up my mind about it; if I'm
+Mabel, I'll stay down here!  It'll be no use their putting their
+heads down and saying "Come up again, dear!"  I shall only look
+up and say "Who am I then?  Tell me that first, and then, if I
+like being that person, I'll come up:  if not, I'll stay down
+here till I'm somebody else"--but, oh dear!' cried Alice, with a
+sudden burst of tears, `I do wish they WOULD put their heads
+down!  I am so VERY tired of being all alone here!'
+As she said this she looked down at her hands, and was
+surprised to see that she had put on one of the Rabbit's little
+white kid gloves while she was talking.  `How CAN I have done
+that?' she thought.  `I must be growing small again.'  She got up
+and went to the table to measure herself by it, and found that,
+as nearly as she could guess, she was now about two feet high,
+and was going on shrinking rapidly:  she soon found out that the
+cause of this was the fan she was holding, and she dropped it
+hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether.
+`That WAS a narrow escape!' said Alice, a good deal frightened at
+the sudden change, but very glad to find herself still in
+existence; `and now for the garden!' and she ran with all speed
+back to the little door:  but, alas! the little door was shut
+again, and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as
+before, `and things are worse than ever,' thought the poor child,
+`for I never was so small as this before, never!  And I declare
+it's too bad, that it is!'
+As she said these words her foot slipped, and in another
+moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt water.  Her first
+idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, `and in that
+case I can go back by railway,' she said to herself.  (Alice had
+been to the seaside once in her life, and had come to the general
+conclusion, that wherever you go to on the English coast you find
+a number of bathing machines in the sea, some children digging in
+the sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodging houses, and
+behind them a railway station.)  However, she soon made out that
+she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she was nine
+feet high.
+`I wish I hadn't cried so much!' said Alice, as she swam about,
+trying to find her way out.  `I shall be punished for it now, I
+suppose, by being drowned in my own tears!  That WILL be a queer
+thing, to be sure!  However, everything is queer to-day.'
+Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a
+little way off, and she swam nearer to make out what it was:  at
+first she thought it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then
+she remembered how small she was now, and she soon made out that
+it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself.
+`Would it be of any use, now,' thought Alice, `to speak to this
+mouse?  Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should
+think very likely it can talk:  at any rate, there's no harm in
+trying.'  So she began:  `O Mouse, do you know the way out of
+this pool?  I am very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!'
+(Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse:
+she had never done such a thing before, but she remembered having
+seen in her brother's Latin Grammar, `A mouse--of a mouse--to a
+mouse--a mouse--O mouse!'  The Mouse looked at her rather
+inquisitively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little
+eyes, but it said nothing.
+`Perhaps it doesn't understand English,' thought Alice; `I
+daresay it's a French mouse, come over with William the
+Conqueror.'  (For, with all her knowledge of history, Alice had
+no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened.)  So she
+began again:  `Ou est ma chatte?' which was the first sentence in
+her French lesson-book.  The Mouse gave a sudden leap out of the
+water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright.  `Oh, I beg
+your pardon!' cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt the
+poor animal's feelings.  `I quite forgot you didn't like cats.'
+`Not like cats!' cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate
+voice.  `Would YOU like cats if you were me?'
+`Well, perhaps not,' said Alice in a soothing tone:  `don't be
+angry about it.  And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah:
+I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you could only see her.
+She is such a dear quiet thing,' Alice went on, half to herself,
+as she swam lazily about in the pool, `and she sits purring so
+nicely by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face--and
+she is such a nice soft thing to nurse--and she's such a capital
+one for catching mice--oh, I beg your pardon!' cried Alice again,
+for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and she felt
+certain it must be really offended.  `We won't talk about her any
+more if you'd rather not.'
+`We indeed!' cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end
+of his tail.  `As if I would talk on such a subject!  Our family
+always HATED cats:  nasty, low, vulgar things!  Don't let me hear
+the name again!'
+`I won't indeed!' said Alice, in a great hurry to change the
+subject of conversation.  `Are you--are you fond--of--of dogs?'
+The Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eagerly:  `There is
+such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you!
+A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly
+brown hair!  And it'll fetch things when you throw them, and
+it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things--I
+can't remember half of them--and it belongs to a farmer, you
+know, and he says it's so useful, it's worth a hundred pounds!
+He says it kills all the rats and--oh dear!' cried Alice in a
+sorrowful tone, `I'm afraid I've offended it again!'  For the
+Mouse was swimming away from her as hard as it could go, and
+making quite a commotion in the pool as it went.
+So she called softly after it, `Mouse dear!  Do come back
+again, and we won't talk about cats or dogs either, if you don't
+like them!'  When the Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam
+slowly back to her:  its face was quite pale (with passion, Alice
+thought), and it said in a low trembling voice, `Let us get to
+the shore, and then I'll tell you my history, and you'll
+understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.'
+It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded
+with the birds and animals that had fallen into it:  there were a
+Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious
+creatures.  Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the
+shore.
+CHAPTER III
+A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale
+They were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the
+bank--the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their
+fur clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and
+uncomfortable.
+The first question of course was, how to get dry again:  they
+had a consultation about this, and after a few minutes it seemed
+quite natural to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with
+them, as if she had known them all her life.  Indeed, she had
+quite a long argument with the Lory, who at last turned sulky,
+and would only say, `I am older than you, and must know better';
+and this Alice would not allow without knowing how old it was,
+and, as the Lory positively refused to tell its age, there was no
+more to be said.
+At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among
+them, called out, `Sit down, all of you, and listen to me!  I'LL
+soon make you dry enough!'  They all sat down at once, in a large
+ring, with the Mouse in the middle.  Alice kept her eyes
+anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would catch a bad
+cold if she did not get dry very soon.
+`Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, `are you all ready?
+This is the driest thing I know.  Silence all round, if you please!
+"William the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was
+soon submitted to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been
+of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest.  Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria--"'
+`Ugh!' said the Lory, with a shiver.
+`I beg your pardon!' said the Mouse, frowning, but very
+politely:  `Did you speak?'
+`Not I!' said the Lory hastily.
+`I thought you did,' said the Mouse.  `--I proceed.  "Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him:
+and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found
+it advisable--"'
+`Found WHAT?' said the Duck.
+`Found IT,' the Mouse replied rather crossly:  `of course you
+know what "it" means.'
+`I know what "it" means well enough, when I find a thing,' said
+the Duck:  `it's generally a frog or a worm.  The question is,
+what did the archbishop find?'
+The Mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on,
+`"--found it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William
+and offer him the crown.  William's conduct at first was
+moderate.  But the insolence of his Normans--"  How are you
+getting on now, my dear?' it continued, turning to Alice as it
+spoke.
+`As wet as ever,' said Alice in a melancholy tone:  `it doesn't
+seem to dry me at all.'
+`In that case,' said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, `I
+move that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more
+energetic remedies--'
+`Speak English!' said the Eaglet.  `I don't know the meaning of
+half those long words, and, what's more, I don't believe you do
+either!'  And the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile:
+some of the other birds tittered audibly.
+`What I was going to say,' said the Dodo in an offended tone,
+`was, that the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race.'
+`What IS a Caucus-race?' said Alice; not that she wanted much
+to know, but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that SOMEBODY
+ought to speak, and no one else seemed inclined to say anything.
+`Why,' said the Dodo, `the best way to explain it is to do it.'
+(And, as you might like to try the thing yourself, some winter
+day, I will tell you how the Dodo managed it.)
+First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle, (`the
+exact shape doesn't matter,' it said,) and then all the party
+were placed along the course, here and there.  There was no `One,
+two, three, and away,' but they began running when they liked,
+and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know
+when the race was over.  However, when they had been running half
+an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo suddenly called
+out `The race is over!' and they all crowded round it, panting,
+and asking, `But who has won?'
+This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of
+thought, and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon
+its forehead (the position in which you usually see Shakespeare,
+in the pictures of him), while the rest waited in silence.  At
+last the Dodo said, `EVERYBODY has won, and all must have
+prizes.'
+`But who is to give the prizes?' quite a chorus of voices
+asked.
+`Why, SHE, of course,' said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with
+one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round her,
+calling out in a confused way, `Prizes! Prizes!'
+Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand
+in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits, (luckily the salt
+water had not got into it), and handed them round as prizes.
+There was exactly one a-piece all round.
+`But she must have a prize herself, you know,' said the Mouse.
+`Of course,' the Dodo replied very gravely.  `What else have
+you got in your pocket?' he went on, turning to Alice.
+`Only a thimble,' said Alice sadly.
+`Hand it over here,' said the Dodo.
+Then they all crowded round her once more, while the Dodo
+solemnly presented the thimble, saying `We beg your acceptance of
+this elegant thimble'; and, when it had finished this short
+speech, they all cheered.
+Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they all looked
+so grave that she did not dare to laugh; and, as she could not
+think of anything to say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble,
+looking as solemn as she could.
+The next thing was to eat the comfits:  this caused some noise
+and confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not
+taste theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on
+the back.  However, it was over at last, and they sat down again
+in a ring, and begged the Mouse to tell them something more.
+`You promised to tell me your history, you know,' said Alice,
+`and why it is you hate--C and D,' she added in a whisper, half
+afraid that it would be offended again.
+`Mine is a long and a sad tale!' said the Mouse, turning to
+Alice, and sighing.
+`It IS a long tail, certainly,' said Alice, looking down with
+wonder at the Mouse's tail; `but why do you call it sad?'  And
+she kept on puzzling about it while the Mouse was speaking, so
+that her idea of the tale was something like this:--
+`Fury said to a
+mouse, That he
+met in the
+house,
+"Let us
+both go to
+law:  I will
+prosecute
+YOU.  --Come,
+I'll take no
+denial; We
+must have a
+trial:  For
+really this
+morning I've
+nothing
+to do."
+Said the
+mouse to the
+cur, "Such
+a trial,
+dear Sir,
+With
+no jury
+or judge,
+would be
+wasting
+our
+breath."
+"I'll be
+judge, I'll
+be jury,"
+Said
+cunning
+old Fury:
+"I'll
+try the
+whole
+cause,
+and
+condemn
+you
+to
+death."'
+Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister
+on the bank, and of having nothing to do:  once or twice she had
+peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no
+pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,'
+thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?'
+So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could,
+for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether
+the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble
+of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White
+Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
+There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice
+think it so VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to
+itself, `Oh dear!  Oh dear!  I shall be late!'  (when she thought
+it over afterwards, it occurred to her that she ought to have
+wondered at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural);
+but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-
+POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, Alice started to
+her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had never
+before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
+take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the
+field after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop
+down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge.
+In another moment down went Alice after it, never once
+considering how in the world she was to get out again.
+The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way,
+and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a
+moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself
+falling down a very deep well.
+Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she
+had plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to
+wonder what was going to happen next.  First, she tried to look
+down and make out what she was coming to, but it was too dark to
+see anything; then she looked at the sides of the well, and
+noticed that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves;
+here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs.  She
+took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was
+labelled `ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great disappointment it
+was empty:  she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing
+somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she
+fell past it.
+`Well!' thought Alice to herself, `after such a fall as this, I
+shall think nothing of tumbling down stairs!  How brave they'll
+all think me at home!  Why, I wouldn't say anything about it,
+even if I fell off the top of the house!' (Which was very likely
+true.)
+Down, down, down.  Would the fall NEVER come to an end!  `I
+wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud.
+`I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth.  Let
+me see:  that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for,
+you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her
+lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a VERY good
+opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to
+listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes,
+that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude
+or Longitude I've got to?'  (Alice had no idea what Latitude was,
+or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to
+say.)
+Presently she began again.  `I wonder if I shall fall right
+THROUGH the earth!  How funny it'll seem to come out among the
+people that walk with their heads downward!  The Antipathies, I
+think--' (she was rather glad there WAS no one listening, this
+time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) `--but I shall
+have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know.
+Please, Ma'am, is this New Zealand or Australia?' (and she tried
+to curtsey as she spoke--fancy CURTSEYING as you're falling
+through the air!  Do you think you could manage it?)  `And what
+an ignorant little girl she'll think me for asking!  No, it'll
+never do to ask:  perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.'
+Down, down, down.  There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon
+began talking again.  `Dinah'll miss me very much to-night, I
+should think!'  (Dinah was the cat.)  `I hope they'll remember
+her saucer of milk at tea-time.  Dinah my dear!  I wish you were
+down here with me!  There are no mice in the air, I'm afraid, but
+you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know.
+But do cats eat bats, I wonder?'  And here Alice began to get
+rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy sort of
+way, `Do cats eat bats?  Do cats eat bats?' and sometimes, `Do
+bats eat cats?' for, you see, as she couldn't answer either
+question, it didn't much matter which way she put it.  She felt
+that she was dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she
+was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and saying to her very
+earnestly, `Now, Dinah, tell me the truth:  did you ever eat a
+bat?' when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of
+sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
+Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a
+moment:  she looked up, but it was all dark overhead; before her
+was another long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in
+sight, hurrying down it.  There was not a moment to be lost:
+away went Alice like the wind, and was just in time to hear it
+say, as it turned a corner, `Oh my ears and whiskers, how late
+it's getting!'  She was close behind it when she turned the
+corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen:  she found
+herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps
+hanging from the roof.
+There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked;
+and when Alice had been all the way down one side and up the
+other, trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle,
+wondering how she was ever to get out again.
+Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table, all made of
+solid glass; there was nothing on it except a tiny golden key,
+and Alice's first thought was that it might belong to one of the
+doors of the hall; but, alas! either the locks were too large, or
+the key was too small, but at any rate it would not open any of
+them.  However, on the second time round, she came upon a low
+curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it was a little
+door about fifteen inches high:  she tried the little golden key
+in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted!
+Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small
+passage, not much larger than a rat-hole:  she knelt down and
+looked along the passage into the loveliest garden you ever saw.
+How she longed to get out of that dark hall, and wander about
+among those beds of bright flowers and those cool fountains, but
+she could not even get her head though the doorway; `and even if
+my head would go through,' thought poor Alice, `it would be of
+very little use without my shoulders.  Oh, how I wish
+I could shut up like a telescope!  I think I could, if I only
+know how to begin.'  For, you see, so many out-of-the-way things
+had happened lately, that Alice had begun to think that very few
+things indeed were really impossible.
+There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she
+went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on
+it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like
+telescopes:  this time she found a little bottle on it, (`which
+certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck
+of the bottle was a paper label, with the words `DRINK ME'
+beautifully printed on it in large letters.
+It was all very well to say `Drink me,' but the wise little
+Alice was not going to do THAT in a hurry.  `No, I'll look
+first,' she said, `and see whether it's marked "poison" or not';
+for she had read several nice little histories about children who
+had got burnt, and eaten up by wild beasts and other unpleasant
+things, all because they WOULD not remember the simple rules
+their friends had taught them:  such as, that a red-hot poker
+will burn you if you hold it too long; and that if you cut your
+finger VERY deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she had
+never forgotten that, if you drink much from a bottle marked
+`poison,' it is almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or
+later.
+However, this bottle was NOT marked `poison,' so Alice ventured
+to taste it, and finding it very nice, (it had, in fact, a sort
+of mixed flavour of cherry-tart, custard, pine-apple, roast
+turkey, toffee, and hot buttered toast,) she very soon finished
+it off.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+`What a curious feeling!' said Alice; `I must be shutting up
+like a telescope.'
+And so it was indeed:  she was now only ten inches high, and
+her face brightened up at the thought that she was now the right
+size for going through the little door into that lovely garden.
+First, however, she waited for a few minutes to see if she was
+going to shrink any further:  she felt a little nervous about
+this; `for it might end, you know,' said Alice to herself, `in my
+going out altogether, like a candle.  I wonder what I should be
+like then?'  And she tried to fancy what the flame of a candle is
+like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember
+ever having seen such a thing.
+After a while, finding that nothing more happened, she decided
+on going into the garden at once; but, alas for poor Alice!
+when she got to the door, she found she had forgotten the
+little golden key, and when she went back to the table for it,
+she found she could not possibly reach it:  she could see it
+quite plainly through the glass, and she tried her best to climb
+up one of the legs of the table, but it was too slippery;
+and when she had tired herself out with trying,
+the poor little thing sat down and cried.
+`Come, there's no use in crying like that!' said Alice to
+herself, rather sharply; `I advise you to leave off this minute!'
+She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very
+seldom followed it), and sometimes she scolded herself so
+severely as to bring tears into her eyes; and once she remembered
+trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game
+of croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious
+child was very fond of pretending to be two people.  `But it's no
+use now,' thought poor Alice, `to pretend to be two people!  Why,
+there's hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable
+person!'
+Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under
+the table:  she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on
+which the words `EAT ME' were beautifully marked in currants.
+`Well, I'll eat it,' said Alice, `and if it makes me grow larger,
+I can reach the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can creep
+under the door; so either way I'll get into the garden, and I
+don't care which happens!'
+She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself, `Which
+way?  Which way?', holding her hand on the top of her head to
+feel which way it was growing, and she was quite surprised to
+find that she remained the same size:  to be sure, this generally
+happens when one eats cake, but Alice had got so much into the
+way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen,
+that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the
+common way.
+So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+CHAPTER II
+The Pool of Tears
+`Curiouser and curiouser!' cried Alice (she was so much
+surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good
+English); `now I'm opening out like the largest telescope that
+ever was!  Good-bye, feet!' (for when she looked down at her
+feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so
+far off).  `Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on
+your shoes and stockings for you now, dears?  I'm sure _I_ shan't
+be able!  I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself
+about you:  you must manage the best way you can; --but I must be
+kind to them,' thought Alice, `or perhaps they won't walk the
+way I want to go!  Let me see:  I'll give them a new pair of
+boots every Christmas.'
+And she went on planning to herself how she would manage it.
+`They must go by the carrier,' she thought; `and how funny it'll
+seem, sending presents to one's own feet!  And how odd the
+directions will look!
+ALICE'S RIGHT FOOT, ESQ.
+HEARTHRUG,
+NEAR THE FENDER,
+(WITH ALICE'S LOVE).
+Oh dear, what nonsense I'm talking!'
+Just then her head struck against the roof of the hall:  in
+fact she was now more than nine feet high, and she at once took
+up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door.
+Poor Alice!  It was as much as she could do, lying down on one
+side, to look through into the garden with one eye; but to get
+through was more hopeless than ever:  she sat down and began to
+cry again.
+`You ought to be ashamed of yourself,' said Alice, `a great
+girl like you,' (she might well say this), `to go on crying in
+this way!  Stop this moment, I tell you!'  But she went on all
+the same, shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool
+all round her, about four inches deep and reaching half down the
+hall.
+After a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the
+distance, and she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming.
+It was the White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a
+pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the
+other:  he came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to
+himself as he came, `Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! Oh! won't she
+be savage if I've kept her waiting!'  Alice felt so desperate
+that she was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit
+came near her, she began, in a low, timid voice, `If you please,
+sir--'  The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid
+gloves and the fan, and skurried away into the darkness as hard
+as he could go.
+Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very
+hot, she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking:
+`Dear, dear!  How queer everything is to-day!  And yesterday
+things went on just as usual.  I wonder if I've been changed in
+the night?  Let me think:  was I the same when I got up this
+morning?  I almost think I can remember feeling a little
+different.  But if I'm not the same, the next question is, Who in
+the world am I?  Ah, THAT'S the great puzzle!'  And she began
+thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age
+as herself, to see if she could have been changed for any of
+them.
+`I'm sure I'm not Ada,' she said, `for her hair goes in such
+long ringlets, and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all; and I'm
+sure I can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she,
+oh! she knows such a very little!  Besides, SHE'S she, and I'm I,
+and--oh dear, how puzzling it all is!  I'll try if I know all the
+things I used to know.  Let me see:  four times five is twelve,
+and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is--oh dear!
+I shall never get to twenty at that rate!  However, the
+Multiplication Table doesn't signify:  let's try Geography.
+London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome,
+and Rome--no, THAT'S all wrong, I'm certain!  I must have been
+changed for Mabel!  I'll try and say "How doth the little--"'
+and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons,
+and began to repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and
+strange, and the words did not come the same as they used to do:--
+`How doth the little crocodile
+Improve his shining tail,
+And pour the waters of the Nile
+On every golden scale!
+`How cheerfully he seems to grin,
+How neatly spread his claws,
+And welcome little fishes in
+With gently smiling jaws!'
+`I'm sure those are not the right words,' said poor Alice, and
+her eyes filled with tears again as she went on, `I must be Mabel
+after all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky little
+house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so
+many lessons to learn!  No, I've made up my mind about it; if I'm
+Mabel, I'll stay down here!  It'll be no use their putting their
+heads down and saying "Come up again, dear!"  I shall only look
+up and say "Who am I then?  Tell me that first, and then, if I
+like being that person, I'll come up:  if not, I'll stay down
+here till I'm somebody else"--but, oh dear!' cried Alice, with a
+sudden burst of tears, `I do wish they WOULD put their heads
+down!  I am so VERY tired of being all alone here!'
+As she said this she looked down at her hands, and was
+surprised to see that she had put on one of the Rabbit's little
+white kid gloves while she was talking.  `How CAN I have done
+that?' she thought.  `I must be growing small again.'  She got up
+and went to the table to measure herself by it, and found that,
+as nearly as she could guess, she was now about two feet high,
+and was going on shrinking rapidly:  she soon found out that the
+cause of this was the fan she was holding, and she dropped it
+hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether.
+`That WAS a narrow escape!' said Alice, a good deal frightened at
+the sudden change, but very glad to find herself still in
+existence; `and now for the garden!' and she ran with all speed
+back to the little door:  but, alas! the little door was shut
+again, and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as
+before, `and things are worse than ever,' thought the poor child,
+`for I never was so small as this before, never!  And I declare
+it's too bad, that it is!'
+As she said these words her foot slipped, and in another
+moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt water.  Her first
+idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, `and in that
+case I can go back by railway,' she said to herself.  (Alice had
+been to the seaside once in her life, and had come to the general
+conclusion, that wherever you go to on the English coast you find
+a number of bathing machines in the sea, some children digging in
+the sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodging houses, and
+behind them a railway station.)  However, she soon made out that
+she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she was nine
+feet high.
+`I wish I hadn't cried so much!' said Alice, as she swam about,
+trying to find her way out.  `I shall be punished for it now, I
+suppose, by being drowned in my own tears!  That WILL be a queer
+thing, to be sure!  However, everything is queer to-day.'
+Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a
+little way off, and she swam nearer to make out what it was:  at
+first she thought it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then
+she remembered how small she was now, and she soon made out that
+it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself.
+`Would it be of any use, now,' thought Alice, `to speak to this
+mouse?  Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should
+think very likely it can talk:  at any rate, there's no harm in
+trying.'  So she began:  `O Mouse, do you know the way out of
+this pool?  I am very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!'
+(Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse:
+she had never done such a thing before, but she remembered having
+seen in her brother's Latin Grammar, `A mouse--of a mouse--to a
+mouse--a mouse--O mouse!'  The Mouse looked at her rather
+inquisitively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little
+eyes, but it said nothing.
+`Perhaps it doesn't understand English,' thought Alice; `I
+daresay it's a French mouse, come over with William the
+Conqueror.'  (For, with all her knowledge of history, Alice had
+no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened.)  So she
+began again:  `Ou est ma chatte?' which was the first sentence in
+her French lesson-book.  The Mouse gave a sudden leap out of the
+water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright.  `Oh, I beg
+your pardon!' cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt the
+poor animal's feelings.  `I quite forgot you didn't like cats.'
+`Not like cats!' cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate
+voice.  `Would YOU like cats if you were me?'
+`Well, perhaps not,' said Alice in a soothing tone:  `don't be
+angry about it.  And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah:
+I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you could only see her.
+She is such a dear quiet thing,' Alice went on, half to herself,
+as she swam lazily about in the pool, `and she sits purring so
+nicely by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face--and
+she is such a nice soft thing to nurse--and she's such a capital
+one for catching mice--oh, I beg your pardon!' cried Alice again,
+for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and she felt
+certain it must be really offended.  `We won't talk about her any
+more if you'd rather not.'
+`We indeed!' cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end
+of his tail.  `As if I would talk on such a subject!  Our family
+always HATED cats:  nasty, low, vulgar things!  Don't let me hear
+the name again!'
+`I won't indeed!' said Alice, in a great hurry to change the
+subject of conversation.  `Are you--are you fond--of--of dogs?'
+The Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eagerly:  `There is
+such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you!
+A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly
+brown hair!  And it'll fetch things when you throw them, and
+it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things--I
+can't remember half of them--and it belongs to a farmer, you
+know, and he says it's so useful, it's worth a hundred pounds!
+He says it kills all the rats and--oh dear!' cried Alice in a
+sorrowful tone, `I'm afraid I've offended it again!'  For the
+Mouse was swimming away from her as hard as it could go, and
+making quite a commotion in the pool as it went.
+So she called softly after it, `Mouse dear!  Do come back
+again, and we won't talk about cats or dogs either, if you don't
+like them!'  When the Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam
+slowly back to her:  its face was quite pale (with passion, Alice
+thought), and it said in a low trembling voice, `Let us get to
+the shore, and then I'll tell you my history, and you'll
+understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.'
+It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded
+with the birds and animals that had fallen into it:  there were a
+Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious
+creatures.  Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the
+shore.
+CHAPTER III
+A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale
+They were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the
+bank--the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their
+fur clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and
+uncomfortable.
+The first question of course was, how to get dry again:  they
+had a consultation about this, and after a few minutes it seemed
+quite natural to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with
+them, as if she had known them all her life.  Indeed, she had
+quite a long argument with the Lory, who at last turned sulky,
+and would only say, `I am older than you, and must know better';
+and this Alice would not allow without knowing how old it was,
+and, as the Lory positively refused to tell its age, there was no
+more to be said.
+At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among
+them, called out, `Sit down, all of you, and listen to me!  I'LL
+soon make you dry enough!'  They all sat down at once, in a large
+ring, with the Mouse in the middle.  Alice kept her eyes
+anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would catch a bad
+cold if she did not get dry very soon.
+`Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, `are you all ready?
+This is the driest thing I know.  Silence all round, if you please!
+"William the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was
+soon submitted to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been
+of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest.  Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria--"'
+`Ugh!' said the Lory, with a shiver.
+`I beg your pardon!' said the Mouse, frowning, but very
+politely:  `Did you speak?'
+`Not I!' said the Lory hastily.
+`I thought you did,' said the Mouse.  `--I proceed.  "Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him:
+and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found
+it advisable--"'
+`Found WHAT?' said the Duck.
+`Found IT,' the Mouse replied rather crossly:  `of course you
+know what "it" means.'
+`I know what "it" means well enough, when I find a thing,' said
+the Duck:  `it's generally a frog or a worm.  The question is,
+what did the archbishop find?'
+The Mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on,
+`"--found it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William
+and offer him the crown.  William's conduct at first was
+moderate.  But the insolence of his Normans--"  How are you
+getting on now, my dear?' it continued, turning to Alice as it
+spoke.
+`As wet as ever,' said Alice in a melancholy tone:  `it doesn't
+seem to dry me at all.'
+`In that case,' said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, `I
+move that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more
+energetic remedies--'
+`Speak English!' said the Eaglet.  `I don't know the meaning of
+half those long words, and, what's more, I don't believe you do
+either!'  And the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile:
+some of the other birds tittered audibly.
+`What I was going to say,' said the Dodo in an offended tone,
+`was, that the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race.'
+`What IS a Caucus-race?' said Alice; not that she wanted much
+to know, but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that SOMEBODY
+ought to speak, and no one else seemed inclined to say anything.
+`Why,' said the Dodo, `the best way to explain it is to do it.'
+(And, as you might like to try the thing yourself, some winter
+day, I will tell you how the Dodo managed it.)
+First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle, (`the
+exact shape doesn't matter,' it said,) and then all the party
+were placed along the course, here and there.  There was no `One,
+two, three, and away,' but they began running when they liked,
+and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know
+when the race was over.  However, when they had been running half
+an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo suddenly called
+out `The race is over!' and they all crowded round it, panting,
+and asking, `But who has won?'
+This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of
+thought, and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon
+its forehead (the position in which you usually see Shakespeare,
+in the pictures of him), while the rest waited in silence.  At
+last the Dodo said, `EVERYBODY has won, and all must have
+prizes.'
+`But who is to give the prizes?' quite a chorus of voices
+asked.
+`Why, SHE, of course,' said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with
+one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round her,
+calling out in a confused way, `Prizes! Prizes!'
+Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand
+in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits, (luckily the salt
+water had not got into it), and handed them round as prizes.
+There was exactly one a-piece all round.
+`But she must have a prize herself, you know,' said the Mouse.
+`Of course,' the Dodo replied very gravely.  `What else have
+you got in your pocket?' he went on, turning to Alice.
+`Only a thimble,' said Alice sadly.
+`Hand it over here,' said the Dodo.
+Then they all crowded round her once more, while the Dodo
+solemnly presented the thimble, saying `We beg your acceptance of
+this elegant thimble'; and, when it had finished this short
+speech, they all cheered.
+Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they all looked
+so grave that she did not dare to laugh; and, as she could not
+think of anything to say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble,
+looking as solemn as she could.
+The next thing was to eat the comfits:  this caused some noise
+and confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not
+taste theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on
+the back.  However, it was over at last, and they sat down again
+in a ring, and begged the Mouse to tell them something more.
+`You promised to tell me your history, you know,' said Alice,
+`and why it is you hate--C and D,' she added in a whisper, half
+afraid that it would be offended again.
+`Mine is a long and a sad tale!' said the Mouse, turning to
+Alice, and sighing.
+`It IS a long tail, certainly,' said Alice, looking down with
+wonder at the Mouse's tail; `but why do you call it sad?'  And
+she kept on puzzling about it while the Mouse was speaking, so
+that her idea of the tale was something like this:--
+`Fury said to a
+mouse, That he
+met in the
+house,
+"Let us
+both go to
+law:  I will
+prosecute
+YOU.  --Come,
+I'll take no
+denial; We
+must have a
+trial:  For
+really this
+morning I've
+nothing
+to do."
+Said the
+mouse to the
+cur, "Such
+a trial,
+dear Sir,
+With
+no jury
+or judge,
+would be
+wasting
+our
+breath."
+"I'll be
+judge, I'll
+be jury,"
+Said
+cunning
+old Fury:
+"I'll
+try the
+whole
+cause,
+and
+condemn
+you
+to
+death."'
+Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister
+on the bank, and of having nothing to do:  once or twice she had
+peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no
+pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,'
+thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?'
+So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could,
+for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether
+the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble
+of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White
+Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
+There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice
+think it so VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to
+itself, `Oh dear!  Oh dear!  I shall be late!'  (when she thought
+it over afterwards, it occurred to her that she ought to have
+wondered at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural);
+but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-
+POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, Alice started to
+her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had never
+before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
+take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the
+field after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop
+down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge.
+In another moment down went Alice after it, never once
+considering how in the world she was to get out again.
+The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way,
+and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a
+moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself
+falling down a very deep well.
+Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she
+had plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to
+wonder what was going to happen next.  First, she tried to look
+down and make out what she was coming to, but it was too dark to
+see anything; then she looked at the sides of the well, and
+noticed that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves;
+here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs.  She
+took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was
+labelled `ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great disappointment it
+was empty:  she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing
+somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she
+fell past it.
+`Well!' thought Alice to herself, `after such a fall as this, I
+shall think nothing of tumbling down stairs!  How brave they'll
+all think me at home!  Why, I wouldn't say anything about it,
+even if I fell off the top of the house!' (Which was very likely
+true.)
+Down, down, down.  Would the fall NEVER come to an end!  `I
+wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud.
+`I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth.  Let
+me see:  that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for,
+you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her
+lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a VERY good
+opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to
+listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes,
+that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude
+or Longitude I've got to?'  (Alice had no idea what Latitude was,
+or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to
+say.)
+Presently she began again.  `I wonder if I shall fall right
+THROUGH the earth!  How funny it'll seem to come out among the
+people that walk with their heads downward!  The Antipathies, I
+think--' (she was rather glad there WAS no one listening, this
+time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) `--but I shall
+have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know.
+Please, Ma'am, is this New Zealand or Australia?' (and she tried
+to curtsey as she spoke--fancy CURTSEYING as you're falling
+through the air!  Do you think you could manage it?)  `And what
+an ignorant little girl she'll think me for asking!  No, it'll
+never do to ask:  perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.'
+Down, down, down.  There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon
+began talking again.  `Dinah'll miss me very much to-night, I
+should think!'  (Dinah was the cat.)  `I hope they'll remember
+her saucer of milk at tea-time.  Dinah my dear!  I wish you were
+down here with me!  There are no mice in the air, I'm afraid, but
+you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know.
+But do cats eat bats, I wonder?'  And here Alice began to get
+rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy sort of
+way, `Do cats eat bats?  Do cats eat bats?' and sometimes, `Do
+bats eat cats?' for, you see, as she couldn't answer either
+question, it didn't much matter which way she put it.  She felt
+that she was dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she
+was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and saying to her very
+earnestly, `Now, Dinah, tell me the truth:  did you ever eat a
+bat?' when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of
+sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
+Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a
+moment:  she looked up, but it was all dark overhead; before her
+was another long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in
+sight, hurrying down it.  There was not a moment to be lost:
+away went Alice like the wind, and was just in time to hear it
+say, as it turned a corner, `Oh my ears and whiskers, how late
+it's getting!'  She was close behind it when she turned the
+corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen:  she found
+herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps
+hanging from the roof.
+There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked;
+and when Alice had been all the way down one side and up the
+other, trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle,
+wondering how she was ever to get out again.
+Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table, all made of
+solid glass; there was nothing on it except a tiny golden key,
+and Alice's first thought was that it might belong to one of the
+doors of the hall; but, alas! either the locks were too large, or
+the key was too small, but at any rate it would not open any of
+them.  However, on the second time round, she came upon a low
+curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it was a little
+door about fifteen inches high:  she tried the little golden key
+in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted!
+Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small
+passage, not much larger than a rat-hole:  she knelt down and
+looked along the passage into the loveliest garden you ever saw.
+How she longed to get out of that dark hall, and wander about
+among those beds of bright flowers and those cool fountains, but
+she could not even get her head though the doorway; `and even if
+my head would go through,' thought poor Alice, `it would be of
+very little use without my shoulders.  Oh, how I wish
+I could shut up like a telescope!  I think I could, if I only
+know how to begin.'  For, you see, so many out-of-the-way things
+had happened lately, that Alice had begun to think that very few
+things indeed were really impossible.
+There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she
+went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on
+it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like
+telescopes:  this time she found a little bottle on it, (`which
+certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck
+of the bottle was a paper label, with the words `DRINK ME'
+beautifully printed on it in large letters.
+It was all very well to say `Drink me,' but the wise little
+Alice was not going to do THAT in a hurry.  `No, I'll look
+first,' she said, `and see whether it's marked "poison" or not';
+for she had read several nice little histories about children who
+had got burnt, and eaten up by wild beasts and other unpleasant
+things, all because they WOULD not remember the simple rules
+their friends had taught them:  such as, that a red-hot poker
+will burn you if you hold it too long; and that if you cut your
+finger VERY deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she had
+never forgotten that, if you drink much from a bottle marked
+`poison,' it is almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or
+later.
+However, this bottle was NOT marked `poison,' so Alice ventured
+to taste it, and finding it very nice, (it had, in fact, a sort
+of mixed flavour of cherry-tart, custard, pine-apple, roast
+turkey, toffee, and hot buttered toast,) she very soon finished
+it off.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+`What a curious feeling!' said Alice; `I must be shutting up
+like a telescope.'
+And so it was indeed:  she was now only ten inches high, and
+her face brightened up at the thought that she was now the right
+size for going through the little door into that lovely garden.
+First, however, she waited for a few minutes to see if she was
+going to shrink any further:  she felt a little nervous about
+this; `for it might end, you know,' said Alice to herself, `in my
+going out altogether, like a candle.  I wonder what I should be
+like then?'  And she tried to fancy what the flame of a candle is
+like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember
+ever having seen such a thing.
+After a while, finding that nothing more happened, she decided
+on going into the garden at once; but, alas for poor Alice!
+when she got to the door, she found she had forgotten the
+little golden key, and when she went back to the table for it,
+she found she could not possibly reach it:  she could see it
+quite plainly through the glass, and she tried her best to climb
+up one of the legs of the table, but it was too slippery;
+and when she had tired herself out with trying,
+the poor little thing sat down and cried.
+`Come, there's no use in crying like that!' said Alice to
+herself, rather sharply; `I advise you to leave off this minute!'
+She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very
+seldom followed it), and sometimes she scolded herself so
+severely as to bring tears into her eyes; and once she remembered
+trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game
+of croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious
+child was very fond of pretending to be two people.  `But it's no
+use now,' thought poor Alice, `to pretend to be two people!  Why,
+there's hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable
+person!'
+Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under
+the table:  she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on
+which the words `EAT ME' were beautifully marked in currants.
+`Well, I'll eat it,' said Alice, `and if it makes me grow larger,
+I can reach the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can creep
+under the door; so either way I'll get into the garden, and I
+don't care which happens!'
+She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself, `Which
+way?  Which way?', holding her hand on the top of her head to
+feel which way it was growing, and she was quite surprised to
+find that she remained the same size:  to be sure, this generally
+happens when one eats cake, but Alice had got so much into the
+way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen,
+that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the
+common way.
+So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake.
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *
+*       *       *       *       *       *       *
+CHAPTER II
+The Pool of Tears
+`Curiouser and curiouser!' cried Alice (she was so much
+surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good
+English); `now I'm opening out like the largest telescope that
+ever was!  Good-bye, feet!' (for when she looked down at her
+feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so
+far off).  `Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on
+your shoes and stockings for you now, dears?  I'm sure _I_ shan't
+be able!  I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself
+about you:  you must manage the best way you can; --but I must be
+kind to them,' thought Alice, `or perhaps they won't walk the
+way I want to go!  Let me see:  I'll give them a new pair of
+boots every Christmas.'
+And she went on planning to herself how she would manage it.
+`They must go by the carrier,' she thought; `and how funny it'll
+seem, sending presents to one's own feet!  And how odd the
+directions will look!
+ALICE'S RIGHT FOOT, ESQ.
+HEARTHRUG,
+NEAR THE FENDER,
+(WITH ALICE'S LOVE).
+Oh dear, what nonsense I'm talking!'
+Just then her head struck against the roof of the hall:  in
+fact she was now more than nine feet high, and she at once took
+up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door.
+Poor Alice!  It was as much as she could do, lying down on one
+side, to look through into the garden with one eye; but to get
+through was more hopeless than ever:  she sat down and began to
+cry again.
+`You ought to be ashamed of yourself,' said Alice, `a great
+girl like you,' (she might well say this), `to go on crying in
+this way!  Stop this moment, I tell you!'  But she went on all
+the same, shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool
+all round her, about four inches deep and reaching half down the
+hall.
+After a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the
+distance, and she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming.
+It was the White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a
+pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the
+other:  he came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to
+himself as he came, `Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! Oh! won't she
+be savage if I've kept her waiting!'  Alice felt so desperate
+that she was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit
+came near her, she began, in a low, timid voice, `If you please,
+sir--'  The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid
+gloves and the fan, and skurried away into the darkness as hard
+as he could go.
+Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very
+hot, she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking:
+`Dear, dear!  How queer everything is to-day!  And yesterday
+things went on just as usual.  I wonder if I've been changed in
+the night?  Let me think:  was I the same when I got up this
+morning?  I almost think I can remember feeling a little
+different.  But if I'm not the same, the next question is, Who in
+the world am I?  Ah, THAT'S the great puzzle!'  And she began
+thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age
+as herself, to see if she could have been changed for any of
+them.
+`I'm sure I'm not Ada,' she said, `for her hair goes in such
+long ringlets, and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all; and I'm
+sure I can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she,
+oh! she knows such a very little!  Besides, SHE'S she, and I'm I,
+and--oh dear, how puzzling it all is!  I'll try if I know all the
+things I used to know.  Let me see:  four times five is twelve,
+and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is--oh dear!
+I shall never get to twenty at that rate!  However, the
+Multiplication Table doesn't signify:  let's try Geography.
+London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome,
+and Rome--no, THAT'S all wrong, I'm certain!  I must have been
+changed for Mabel!  I'll try and say "How doth the little--"'
+and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons,
+and began to repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and
+strange, and the words did not come the same as they used to do:--
+`How doth the little crocodile
+Improve his shining tail,
+And pour the waters of the Nile
+On every golden scale!
+`How cheerfully he seems to grin,
+How neatly spread his claws,
+And welcome little fishes in
+With gently smiling jaws!'
+`I'm sure those are not the right words,' said poor Alice, and
+her eyes filled with tears again as she went on, `I must be Mabel
+after all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky little
+house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so
+many lessons to learn!  No, I've made up my mind about it; if I'm
+Mabel, I'll stay down here!  It'll be no use their putting their
+heads down and saying "Come up again, dear!"  I shall only look
+up and say "Who am I then?  Tell me that first, and then, if I
+like being that person, I'll come up:  if not, I'll stay down
+here till I'm somebody else"--but, oh dear!' cried Alice, with a
+sudden burst of tears, `I do wish they WOULD put their heads
+down!  I am so VERY tired of being all alone here!'
+As she said this she looked down at her hands, and was
+surprised to see that she had put on one of the Rabbit's little
+white kid gloves while she was talking.  `How CAN I have done
+that?' she thought.  `I must be growing small again.'  She got up
+and went to the table to measure herself by it, and found that,
+as nearly as she could guess, she was now about two feet high,
+and was going on shrinking rapidly:  she soon found out that the
+cause of this was the fan she was holding, and she dropped it
+hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether.
+`That WAS a narrow escape!' said Alice, a good deal frightened at
+the sudden change, but very glad to find herself still in
+existence; `and now for the garden!' and she ran with all speed
+back to the little door:  but, alas! the little door was shut
+again, and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as
+before, `and things are worse than ever,' thought the poor child,
+`for I never was so small as this before, never!  And I declare
+it's too bad, that it is!'
+As she said these words her foot slipped, and in another
+moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt water.  Her first
+idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, `and in that
+case I can go back by railway,' she said to herself.  (Alice had
+been to the seaside once in her life, and had come to the general
+conclusion, that wherever you go to on the English coast you find
+a number of bathing machines in the sea, some children digging in
+the sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodging houses, and
+behind them a railway station.)  However, she soon made out that
+she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she was nine
+feet high.
+`I wish I hadn't cried so much!' said Alice, as she swam about,
+trying to find her way out.  `I shall be punished for it now, I
+suppose, by being drowned in my own tears!  That WILL be a queer
+thing, to be sure!  However, everything is queer to-day.'
+Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a
+little way off, and she swam nearer to make out what it was:  at
+first she thought it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then
+she remembered how small she was now, and she soon made out that
+it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself.
+`Would it be of any use, now,' thought Alice, `to speak to this
+mouse?  Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should
+think very likely it can talk:  at any rate, there's no harm in
+trying.'  So she began:  `O Mouse, do you know the way out of
+this pool?  I am very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!'
+(Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse:
+she had never done such a thing before, but she remembered having
+seen in her brother's Latin Grammar, `A mouse--of a mouse--to a
+mouse--a mouse--O mouse!'  The Mouse looked at her rather
+inquisitively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little
+eyes, but it said nothing.
+`Perhaps it doesn't understand English,' thought Alice; `I
+daresay it's a French mouse, come over with William the
+Conqueror.'  (For, with all her knowledge of history, Alice had
+no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened.)  So she
+began again:  `Ou est ma chatte?' which was the first sentence in
+her French lesson-book.  The Mouse gave a sudden leap out of the
+water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright.  `Oh, I beg
+your pardon!' cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt the
+poor animal's feelings.  `I quite forgot you didn't like cats.'
+`Not like cats!' cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate
+voice.  `Would YOU like cats if you were me?'
+`Well, perhaps not,' said Alice in a soothing tone:  `don't be
+angry about it.  And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah:
+I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you could only see her.
+She is such a dear quiet thing,' Alice went on, half to herself,
+as she swam lazily about in the pool, `and she sits purring so
+nicely by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face--and
+she is such a nice soft thing to nurse--and she's such a capital
+one for catching mice--oh, I beg your pardon!' cried Alice again,
+for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and she felt
+certain it must be really offended.  `We won't talk about her any
+more if you'd rather not.'
+`We indeed!' cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end
+of his tail.  `As if I would talk on such a subject!  Our family
+always HATED cats:  nasty, low, vulgar things!  Don't let me hear
+the name again!'
+`I won't indeed!' said Alice, in a great hurry to change the
+subject of conversation.  `Are you--are you fond--of--of dogs?'
+The Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eagerly:  `There is
+such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you!
+A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly
+brown hair!  And it'll fetch things when you throw them, and
+it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things--I
+can't remember half of them--and it belongs to a farmer, you
+know, and he says it's so useful, it's worth a hundred pounds!
+He says it kills all the rats and--oh dear!' cried Alice in a
+sorrowful tone, `I'm afraid I've offended it again!'  For the
+Mouse was swimming away from her as hard as it could go, and
+making quite a commotion in the pool as it went.
+So she called softly after it, `Mouse dear!  Do come back
+again, and we won't talk about cats or dogs either, if you don't
+like them!'  When the Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam
+slowly back to her:  its face was quite pale (with passion, Alice
+thought), and it said in a low trembling voice, `Let us get to
+the shore, and then I'll tell you my history, and you'll
+understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.'
+It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded
+with the birds and animals that had fallen into it:  there were a
+Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious
+creatures.  Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the
+shore.
+CHAPTER III
+A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale
+They were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the
+bank--the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their
+fur clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and
+uncomfortable.
+The first question of course was, how to get dry again:  they
+had a consultation about this, and after a few minutes it seemed
+quite natural to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with
+them, as if she had known them all her life.  Indeed, she had
+quite a long argument with the Lory, who at last turned sulky,
+and would only say, `I am older than you, and must know better';
+and this Alice would not allow without knowing how old it was,
+and, as the Lory positively refused to tell its age, there was no
+more to be said.
+At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among
+them, called out, `Sit down, all of you, and listen to me!  I'LL
+soon make you dry enough!'  They all sat down at once, in a large
+ring, with the Mouse in the middle.  Alice kept her eyes
+anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would catch a bad
+cold if she did not get dry very soon.
+`Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, `are you all ready?
+This is the driest thing I know.  Silence all round, if you please!
+"William the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was
+soon submitted to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been
+of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest.  Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria--"'
+`Ugh!' said the Lory, with a shiver.
+`I beg your pardon!' said the Mouse, frowning, but very
+politely:  `Did you speak?'
+`Not I!' said the Lory hastily.
+`I thought you did,' said the Mouse.  `--I proceed.  "Edwin and
+Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him:
+and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found
+it advisable--"'
+`Found WHAT?' said the Duck.
+`Found IT,' the Mouse replied rather crossly:  `of course you
+know what "it" means.'
+`I know what "it" means well enough, when I find a thing,' said
+the Duck:  `it's generally a frog or a worm.  The question is,
+what did the archbishop find?'
+The Mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on,
+`"--found it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William
+and offer him the crown.  William's conduct at first was
+moderate.  But the insolence of his Normans--"  How are you
+getting on now, my dear?' it continued, turning to Alice as it
+spoke.
+`As wet as ever,' said Alice in a melancholy tone:  `it doesn't
+seem to dry me at all.'
+`In that case,' said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, `I
+move that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more
+energetic remedies--'
+`Speak English!' said the Eaglet.  `I don't know the meaning of
+half those long words, and, what's more, I don't believe you do
+either!'  And the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile:
+some of the other birds tittered audibly.
+`What I was going to say,' said the Dodo in an offended tone,
+`was, that the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race.'
+`What IS a Caucus-race?' said Alice; not that she wanted much
+to know, but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that SOMEBODY
+ought to speak, and no one else seemed inclined to say anything.
+`Why,' said the Dodo, `the best way to explain it is to do it.'
+(And, as you might like to try the thing yourself, some winter
+day, I will tell you how the Dodo managed it.)
+First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle, (`the
+exact shape doesn't matter,' it said,) and then all the party
+were placed along the course, here and there.  There was no `One,
+two, three, and away,' but they began running when they liked,
+and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know
+when the race was over.  However, when they had been running half
+an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo suddenly called
+out `The race is over!' and they all crowded round it, panting,
+and asking, `But who has won?'
+This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of
+thought, and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon
+its forehead (the position in which you usually see Shakespeare,
+in the pictures of him), while the rest waited in silence.  At
+last the Dodo said, `EVERYBODY has won, and all must have
+prizes.'
+`But who is to give the prizes?' quite a chorus of voices
+asked.
+`Why, SHE, of course,' said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with
+one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round her,
+calling out in a confused way, `Prizes! Prizes!'
+Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand
+in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits, (luckily the salt
+water had not got into it), and handed them round as prizes.
+There was exactly one a-piece all round.
+`But she must have a prize herself, you know,' said the Mouse.
+`Of course,' the Dodo replied very gravely.  `What else have
+you got in your pocket?' he went on, turning to Alice.
+`Only a thimble,' said Alice sadly.
+`Hand it over here,' said the Dodo.
+Then they all crowded round her once more, while the Dodo
+solemnly presented the thimble, saying `We beg your acceptance of
+this elegant thimble'; and, when it had finished this short
+speech, they all cheered.
+Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they all looked
+so grave that she did not dare to laugh; and, as she could not
+think of anything to say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble,
+looking as solemn as she could.
+The next thing was to eat the comfits:  this caused some noise
+and confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not
+taste theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on
+the back.  However, it was over at last, and they sat down again
+in a ring, and begged the Mouse to tell them something more.
+`You promised to tell me your history, you know,' said Alice,
+`and why it is you hate--C and D,' she added in a whisper, half
+afraid that it would be offended again.
+`Mine is a long and a sad tale!' said the Mouse, turning to
+Alice, and sighing.
+`It IS a long tail, certainly,' said Alice, looking down with
+wonder at the Mouse's tail; `but why do you call it sad?'  And
+she kept on puzzling about it while the Mouse was speaking, so
+that her idea of the tale was something like this:--
+`Fury said to a
+mouse, That he
+met in the
+house,
+"Let us
+both go to
+law:  I will
+prosecute
+YOU.  --Come,
+I'll take no
+denial; We
+must have a
+trial:  For
+really this
+morning I've
+nothing
+to do."
+Said the
+mouse to the
+cur, "Such
+a trial,
+dear Sir,
+With
+no jury
+or judge,
+would be
+wasting
+our
+breath."
+"I'll be
+judge, I'll
+be jury,"
+Said
+cunning
+old Fury:
+"I'll
+try the
+whole
+cause,
+and
+condemn
+you
+to
+death."'
+</div>
+</body></html>

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